Take Me Back (Deja Vu) -- For @crawlingbackwards

[california_dreaming]

Hawkins, Indiana. Friday, June 30th, 1995.

Ten years ago to the day a young lifeguard was kidnapped by her coworker from the pool, an act that ultimately led to hear death. Ten years and one day ago, the life of a particular asshole from California had been changed forever. Later on he'd blown out of town, not looking back, unable to face the horrors that the now infamously cursed town had in store.

A bit under a year later he read newspapers about a state of emergency that almost made him get back in his beat Ford Escort and drive back. But no. Nothing could ever get him to go back to that hellhole. That's what he told himself.

Hilarious that ten years to the day that his life had been ruined he had done just that, holing up in a hotel for some sleep to recover before what would be yet another life changing weekend in the cursed town. His ten year high school reunion. Hell, Billy didn't even know for sure just how the invitation had gotten to him. Someone must have found his contact information, because it had come and for a laugh he'd agreed.

Mostly because it was long past due when he should check in on Max, and he'd heard she might be in town checking on Susan. The drive was nice too. Good for inspiration. He'd taken it slower than the trip back to California, stopping at points with great views, hauling out a sketchbook, and getting ideas down on paper when he needed it. Never knew when some small detail would create something beautiful. Or terrible. Worked either way. Still gets into town, crashes on the couch in Susan's place after a meal (she'd actually gotten a bit better at cocking, who could have expected it), and then prepares for what comes next.


Billy Hargrove knows how to make an entrance. Has already made one in this small town before, but he does it now for old time's sake. Waits until he'll be half an hour late, so he can ensure all eyes are on him. If he's going to be back in this place of nightmares and memories, he wanted to live out some of the good ones. Which means tearing into the school parking lot in his blue and white Chevy Chevelle, engine roaring, music blaring. Barely anyone is outside of the school building, already headed into the gym, but the few who are...

Oh the looks he gets. They know this entrance. They know what it means. And before he even gets out of the car he knows there are whispers. But he does get out, smooths his fitted and well worn jeans over his legs as he does so. Back then he'd be in some shirt he hadn't bothered to do up all the way. These days he's still too mindful of old scars, choosing instead to have one where he can have the sleeves up and the buttons all done, like self respect. After a moment to psych himself up he gets out and makes for the gym.

"Well damn, Carol, you sure aged like fine wine," he says as he comes to a stop at the check in desk, smiling down at her. She looks so shocked. Like she can't believe he's here. Neither can Billy. But he keeps smiling and she reaches for a badge that is really deep in the box, like no one expected it to be needed.

"You too," she says as she hands it up. "Like what you did with your hair."

Billy reaches up, considers the curls. They're bleached more blonde than ever from all the sun back home, just as changed by California as he had been. But when he touches it he almost laughs. Apparently he'd forgotten to pull his hair out of the sloppy bun he'd put it in earlier while helping tidy a bit around Susan's place. Even reaches for the tie when Carol shakes her head.

"Oh no. Leave it like that," she grins. "You look tasty."

And Billy laughs as he accepts the passed over name tag so he can affix it to his shirt.

"When have I not been a snack?" he asks before nodding to Carol. "See you inside later."

Then he heads past her into the gym and feels the eyes turning on him.

Billy Hargrove had come back to Hawkins High School. Now he just needed to make it through the night. Maybe it would be easier this time, because so much of the old arrogance and steel had been worked off of him, just leaving a softer, happier man in its place.

Comments

[crawlingbackwards]

"Heh yeah, well unlike you and Will I'm not all that artistically inclined. And I'm not that great at music like Eddie so...I just talk to my therapist and take care of my kids. I try to be there for them if they need me, even if they're all adults now."

"Last I heard she moved out to New York, got a job at some law firm or something with a new boyfriend. Good for her." He rolled his eyes again, trying to let the bitterness and tension roll off him. He was here to have fun and getting to catch up with someone who got it. Robin would be pissed if he came back in a foul mood.

"But seriously, Lizzie's just my reminder that I don't have to look for love. Y'know? I have family and if someone wants to come along and be a part of that then sure. But it's not a requirement."

He shifts a bit before continuing.

"What about you? Any lucky someone back home in Cali? Someone waiting for you?"

[california_dreaming]

Damn right they're adults. At this point the four to five year age gap doesn't even seem all that important. Basically the same age. But those old bonds are always hard to change.

"Don't assume you're done with all that. Sometimes love comes out of nowhere, when you're not expecting it. Or some other artistic shit like that," he laughs. "There's so many songs about it. Hell, there's Corrod-"

No. Wait. Billy's having a moment of revelation here. Can't mention Corroded Coffin without thinking about the band and thus the lead guitar and...

"Holy shit that's Eddie Munson," he laughs. Wow, okay, small world. Wasn't expecting that. "Well, that solves a mystery I didn't even know I had. Anyway, you're probably still a catch, and love will probably find you if you really want it. But you don't have to spend your time chasing it when you've got a kid to look after."

As for him. Billy just rolls his shoulders in a shrug.

"Just my dog and a friend who crashes on my couch sometimes named Argyle. Fucking socks, right? I've got my art, and given how often I'm covered in paint, and always covered in scars, hasn't seemed worth chasing more than a night here or there with people."

[crawlingbackwards]

Steve laughed as Billy was realizing that the lead guitar of Corroded Coffin and Eddie "The Freak" Munson were one and the same.

"That's him alright, and yeah I know. I've been to a few of their concerts...and practices." Steve shrugged, he may not have been a fan of metal but Eddie was a friend so of course he had to be there to support him. "That's what I mean though, I'm not like...completely giving up. Just...not searching. Besides my tastes are..." He pauses a bit, looking Billy over and the mention of Eddie and not to mention...wait...

"Wait a minute. You have a friend named Argyle? In California? What are the fucking odds....Jonathan came back here after he and his family moved out there and he had his buddy with him. His name was Argyle. Total stoner, drove a pizza van all the way from Lenora Hills out here." There was no way it could have been the same chill guy. Right?

[california_dreaming]

His tastes are what? Why are there eyes on him in that moment? No, Harrington, go back because you've got a little flutter of hope going on in Billy's still broad chest.

Then again... Steve's talking about the name like it means something. And the man he's describing... Billy laughs. Holy shit. Lenora Hills wasn't too far from the LA area so it's really possible.

"You telling me that Arg knows about shit? I could have been talking about my shit and I wasn't?"

[crawlingbackwards]

"Knows about it? The man helped El have some weird mind fight from a dough freezer." Steve laughed, leaning in as he finished his beer and shook his head. The more he heard who Billy was friends with the more Steve felt like maybe it could be safe? Between that, the good memories, and the beer...Steve was feeling a little more brave than usual.

"Well, like I was saying. My tastes are a little more...similar to...I mean if you know Eddie? He's...introduced me to people. At a few of his gigs. Back before he was touring more and just played in like, Indiana?" That was a safe way to put it right? And hopefully Billy got the hint. God he could only hope because the last thing he needed was to be wrong and the blonde to blow up here of all places.

[california_dreaming]

Dough freezer? What the actual fuck? That's something he's going to have to ask Arg about when he gets home. Even wants to ask about it only for Steve to...

Well, leave things in a place where Billy has to contemplate what he's saying. And that's definitely a whole thing. Enough of one to make him raise an eyebrow and look around. Like this was a secret that shouldn't be offered out.

"My tastes only run... half-way along his lines," Billy admits.

[crawlingbackwards]

"Yeah?" Steve looked a little surprised and then, relieved. His shoulders seemed to relax more as he made to take a drink from his cup only to realize it was empty.

"Robin and I got close after the fiasco before you left, then we got closer the rest of that year. Her and Eddie talked to me about things and...I guess stuff started to click, some of high school definitely made more sense." Like the apparent sexual tension between him and Billy that Robin had mentioned sensing but never talked about until everything was over and Billy was long gone. "Sadly living out here makes it...hard...but Indianapolis is pretty nice. I keep thinking about moving out there since it's just an hour away."

He sort of chuckles. "I think the way Eddie put it was, 'some people like pepsi and some people like coke, and then there are the people who like both'. It's so simplified but it works."

[california_dreaming]

"Like telling me not the cream my pants just from seeing you?" Billy can't help but tease.

Oh yes, that one makes a lot more sense now and this time when he smiles it is with that wide grin that promises everything. Things he knows he can deliver.

"Move. Cities are a bit easier. California is a fucking dream. San Fran is high on the list but LA is the center of entertainment in most cases so you can't throw a rock without hitting someone who likes Coke."

So, you know, just advice.

"Though you did mention not wanting to seek shit out anymore. You'd have to still seek there. Even with your cute glasses."

[crawlingbackwards]

"To be fair, you were the one who asked if you were dreaming. Didn't know I featured." Steve teased right back, easily becoming more comfortable in the conversation as he laughed and shook his head.

"Maybe after Lizzie's older, for now I want something stable and you're right...I'm not looking. If it happens it happens, but it's not gonna just happen here." reaching up Steve fiddled with his glasses with a sigh. He'd worn them for long enough now that he forgot he hadn't had them in high school.

"They're not cute," He muttered, fighting down the flush that tried to creep onto his cheeks.

[california_dreaming]

"A prominent role," Billy assures him. How can he not when he knows this is allowed?

"They are. Who is the better judge of aesthetics here, Harrington? The self conscious teacher who has clearly been failed by the women in his life, or the artist?"

The answer is clear. And with that said he gets to his feet.

"I should mingle. Because if I let myself look at your hair and smile and glasses and blush any longer, I'm going to say things that can get me run out of town."

[crawlingbackwards]

And oh does that blush only get deeper, between the admission to Billy flat out flirting with him Steve can't help it. Clearing his throat he nods once again raising his empty cup to his lips only to roll his eyes at himself.

"Hey uh, how long are you in town for? Maybe...maybe you can swing by? I still live in the same house. You can come by...re-meet Robin? We can hang out and talk? You can tell me more about California?" He didn't want to just let Billy leave without saying something, even if it still left it more up to Billy. For all he knew the blonde could leave town and he'd never see him again. That would suck but...he'd also understand.

[california_dreaming]

"The weekend," he says. Which means at least another two days. He smiles at Steve from where he's standing, looking a bit pleased with the question. "Don't know Robin, never met her. But yeah. I could do that if you want. Check in with me before you leave. Or before I leave. We'll figure something out."

[crawlingbackwards]

"Right..." She was only Steve's best friend in the entire world and one more person who helped Steve figure out a lot about himself. Granted he almost forgets for a moment that Billy never would have seen her much in school.

"Cool, yeah, I'll come find you later. Or you can come find me...whichever works." Why did he feel so much more nervous than before!? He felt like a teenager asking out a cute guy. As Billy left the table Steve ran his hands through his hair and over his face under his glasses. Who knew that Billy Hargrove had chilled out so much and had ended up being so...calm? Sure everyone knew the man was handsome back in school but...actually flirting back with Steve? In public even! Sure they were being careful enough but still.

He had to tell Eddie and Robin about this. They'd never let him live it down. Getting up from the table Steve made his way over to the refreshments table again to get a refill and something to snack on while mingling with some of their classmates. Sure he hadn't gotten along with his old friends any more but it was better than nothing.

[california_dreaming]

There's a lot of people who want to see him, who want to talk to him. So many people that try and corner him out and Billy doesn't bother trying to stop them. Talks again, whenever people ask. Confesses to being an artist, that he doesn't play basketball anymore, that he still doesn't remember much of that fourth of july ten years ago.

It's jarring. Upsetting to relive it all so many times once more. In the end it's only an hour before Billy is trying to sneak out to get space to breathe away from the mess of people who keep bothering him.

[crawlingbackwards]

Steve knew the look when he saw it. The way Billy was shying away from talk about before he left, the near haunted look he started to get when ever anyone mentioned it. All that mixed with the subject matter of his art, that Steve had seen, made it very obvious to Steve that it all still haunted the young man. The last thing anyone deserved was being reminded of the worst night of their life.

It's after one of the pushier people brings it up that Steve steps in with a frown. "That was a pretty dark time for a lot of us, don't you think it's the wrong place to bring it up." Shifting into the conversation Steve ran a hand through his hair and removed his glasses. "If you ladies don't mind, I need to steal Hargrove for a minute. You still good with cars Billy? Let one of the brats borrow my car and it's been making a weird noise ever since."

The look he gave Billy was one clearly meant to say 'I'm giving you an out, please take it' but he wasn't sure if the blonde would.

[california_dreaming]

Two things Billy wasn't expecting: Steve hovering nearby and Steve stepping in. The first was frustrating, the second made him grateful as all fuck. Even if the excuse was a piss poor one. He nods, weakly, barely even making his polite excuses and definitely not promising to come back and pick up the conversation. There's no chance. Hell, he might not come back in at all. He's done his thing. Wowed people with his still being alive. Made his showing and if this was all the small town wanted to talk about why should he even stay.

"Sure, show me the clunker. Tell me it's not the Beamer still. That shit isn't made for long term."

[crawlingbackwards]

"I mean it's not the same Beamer." Steve rolled his eyes, leading his way out to the parking lot. Of course as they got further from the doors and the people he turned to glance over his shoulder.

"There isn't really anything setting, you just looked like you really wanted out, sorry."

[california_dreaming]

Thank fuck. Those things were practically built to be replaced. So rich people would buy new ones. But if it’s another Beamer, dude, that would be a choice. It’s nice, though, once they get outside. Billy feels like he can breathe again. Hell, he lets himself do so.

“Yeah,” he admits as he comes to a stop. “You’re the sort to be a responsible dad. If you heard a noise, you’d have taken it in by now, right?”

[crawlingbackwards]

"Basically. Not to mention I'd never let those hellions near my car. Period." Steve laughed, stretching his arms over his head for a moment as he did in fact lead Billy towards his car, more because he was thinking about leaving too and Billy was following him than anything else.

While not the newest model it's still a newer BMW than what he used to drive. Complete with a child seat in the back and an array of toys strewn through out at a glance.

"Mom insisted that I get one, I just wanted to get something sensible. Lizzie doesn't care what she's in so long as her toys are there, ya know?"

[california_dreaming]

Alright, he could stand walking a bit. Though of course when he’s in sight of the car he bursts out laughing. What the hell man?

“You know, if you hadn’t said that I was going to rag on you about how there are more affordable vehicles with good safety ratings that are suitable for kids. At least she’s being a good grandma. She pay for it too?”

She better have, with what Beamers cost. But he is just peeking through the window to see the mess.

“Absolutely disaster area.”

[crawlingbackwards]

"are you kidding?! I wanted to just get a minivan with how I keep getting used as a taxi. I definitely asked her to pay for it." Steve laughed and shook his head.

"But yeah, and to think I cleaned it yesterday." There's a find sorry if look as he moved to lean against the hood of the car, looking at the blonde.

"I'm not gonna say anything about what happened before you left but... I'm glad you're doing better, I'm glad you showed up."

[california_dreaming]

“Seriously, the brats are, what, twenty fucking four? They can get themselves around,” Billy dismisses as he pulls away from the window. Clearly not impressed by your Beamer, Steve.

“I am. Most days. Some days…”

His hand rubs unconsciously over his shirt, over the skin under it, over the scar that was placed just barely far enough to the right to keep it from being instantly fatal. Sometimes he wondered if his survival, if the suffering with that survival, was another intentional wound.

“Some days aren’t as good. Guess this one is skewing that way now.”

[crawlingbackwards]

Instead of responding about the "kids" who were very much adults who could take care of themselves, Steve listened to Billy, watched him run at spots that Steve was sure were covered in scars. Unbuttoning the top few buttons of his shirt, Steve triggered his collar aside to reveal a rather wicked looking line of scaring asking his throat.

"You aren't alone. I get it. You got out in time...shit just got worse the next spring."

[california_dreaming]

Shit man. Billy looks shocked, and he definitely looks like he wants to reach out and touch Steve's neck. But nope, he won't do that. Not appropriate, even if they were sorta kinda flirting earlier.

"The freak earthquake?"

jfc I just reread my last post.....sorry mobile tags and me don't get along LOL

[crawlingbackwards]

Steve just nods.

"They aren't the only ones. You should see the ones Eddie got...actually we have matching ones." He sort of chuckled, hand falling from his tie to cross his body an drub at one side before he shrugged it off. "Shit just got worse the next spring. Some of us ended up where that...thing had been from? We faced what had been controlling it...it was a guy. Well he used to be a guy but it was...it was so fucked up."

Steve takes a deep breath but then lets it out and shakes his head. "Sorry, you don't need to hear about all that. It's all fine now. Hawkins is safe, Lucas is safe, everything has been over for years." They all went on to live normal lives. It was fine.